An Avid Observer

Date: July 24th “Run boy run. Run faster”. You have to get yourself.   I said to myself as I do always, talking to myself in the absence. I speak to myself. I correct myself. I have my own code of ethics these days because I lack myself. I don’t have my mirror. This chance shouldn’t be void. I ran harder thinking and thinking. I couldn’t put on my new shoes. Sounds funny? Yeah! I preferred to my one year aged slipper instead in hurry. This expresses me as well. How slippery character I must be. I adore slipping again and again though my toes bleed, my feet toy with the ground and I may fall in the rain again. But who gives a damn. I just knew I had to run. What I remember myself is I keep running always whether it is dream or I am alive in this world. I have always found myself running. And I have well idea that why I love to run that even in my sleep I am running though I am not an athlete. I run through day and night. But now it is the evening time. I ran through the peop...

Hey please stop disconcerting me. As I said you earlier in the morning I hate you now. I don’t like you to sense me anyway. I covet to be far from you by all the means. Please have mercy on me. Stop it. I have a long way to go. I have my family and my people those who love me. Let me be for them. I have to give my best to them. Simply, they deserve it. I do have some responsibilities for them. Now, it’s the time to give myself back to them. They have already taken back their hope from me. I want you to be my guiding light to lead me to the arena. I expect you to cool me and shower on my ways when the burning sun is drying my skin, my throat and stealing remaining breaths. But I don’t have any problem with the sun because it was never familiar with me. It was always cruel and unheard to me. It at all times tried its best to serve me its best ache. I have some complains. Some answers to your questions. You were once mine, all mine. There was everything between me and you as everyone ...

Today, I felt somehow down to myself. A sense of regret inside me. It’s not accurately being repentant but it is the worst feeling caused by not having a good luck. Since, I was not born with the silver spoon in my mouth it’s obvious. I am not moneyed. I wish I would have been a millionaire. Being millionaire or richy means a lot and makes different too. Today I lacked something that would have been fulfilled if I were rich. I missed to upload my reaction, the fresh feeling. If only I would have a laptop or any latest electronic gadgets then it would have been possible to happen. The sight was in front of me. I was thrashed that I thought it would be better to just follow. “Keep following buddy. Don’t try to walk ahead” I ordered to myself. So did I. I kept myself following the shadow. It was a bit ironical as well for me. I m always followed by my own shadow and in the same way others are followed too but I was running behind without any sound, being soundless someone else’s shadow...

Don't Try to Describe the Ocean If You've Never Seen It. I thought I was valiant enough and sturdy enough to stare these things right in the face and trounce them.  I considered I knew what desolation felt like.I thought I knew what it felt like to be hopeless.

"MY LIFE HAS BEEN THE POEM I WOULD HAVE WRIT, BUT I COULD NOT BOTH LIVE AND UTTER IT." HENRY DAVID THOREAU (1817-1862)

I think this is going to be the last rain. I am not getting wet though I walk under it. Once used to be a time when I loved it without any reason because somehow there was a reason for me. A reason less reason but now there is no reason to get wet. Since there is no reason so without any reason I just hate it now. Today, while I was returning back from the college it again found me on the way. It winded my hair and started kissing my face as if it loved me once. So I allowed it because I exactly knew that it going to be the last romance between me and her. I let it made me wet completely. It followed me till I was at my shelter, my home, my den where I always expect it to happen. But it never comes. Knowing all this, I furthermore make my mind up that this is my last rain. I won't get soggy again. Yes!!! This is my last rain. I will never be set to celebrate it. It always planted me in soaking mud. It has always left making me completely saturated and assembling its way a...

मेरो सेतो जुता अब कालो भएछ महँगो भएर होला अब यसलाई दागले पनि छोएछ।  तराइका मैदानहरु र कुलेखानीहुँदै नगरकोटका अग्ला डाडा समेत चुमायो बिहान देखी बेलुका काठमाडौंका गल्लिमा समेत डोरयायो।  सधैं म सँगै हुनेले अब मलाई छोडदैछ मलाई एक्लो पारेर अब पर सर्दैछ।  मेरो बसन्तमा मलाई रमायो, शरदमा हृदयनै ततायो।   तर मेरो जीवनमा झरी लाग्दा मेरो प्यारो बस्तुले पनि बाटो ततायो।   अहिले मलाई तिम्रो खाचो छ म सँग अरु केही छैन कोही छैन तिम्रो महत्व निकै साचो छ तिमी जस्तो अरु केही छैन कोही छैन।  जिन्दगीभर आफूसँगै सजाएर राखने धोको अपुरो रहयो।  हो, मेरो सेतो जुता अब पुरानो भयो।  सुन्दर भएर होला पापी आँखाले छोएछ म एक्लो भएर होला यसले पनि मलाई छोडेछ। 

She is my mystifying lady She is always with me whom I love the most whom I never leave lost. She is my sunshine, the lyric and my rhyme. We aren't together yet I keep her forever. She isn't the one. She is someone. lone I have witnessed her when she was there. She isn't what they perceive She is what my heart receive I wish she could have been the same whose u don't know the name. As I let know you the one makes me blue. You can't recognize my baby She is not so easy. I wish I cud make her mine and take her with me on cloud no. nine. I will say when I'll make my way. She is so pretty that crafts me forget my duty she is curly hates being girly. She is twisted, detests being decked. This may harm. May make rout her charm. You can spot my sense when I possess the presence A smirk on my face like a minute ago triumphed a race. I m sheltered, utterly isolated. I am bemused brutall...

म र तिमी कि तिमी र म न म नै न तिमी म कहिले तिमी हुन सकिन मैले तिम्रो हृदय छुन सकिन।  तिमी सधैं तिमी नै भयौ सधैं उज्यालोमा रम्यौ म सधैं म नै भये अन्धयारोमा हराये। तिम्रो नाम हुँदै गयो म बदनाम हुँदै गए तिमी पाउदै गयौ म गुमाउदै गए। म भिडमा बिलिन भए तिमी एक्लो भिडमा भयौ म एक्लै भिडमा भए तिमी भिडमा पनि चिनियौ। हामी कहिले हामी हुन सकेनौ न म बद्लिए न तिमी नै हामी कहिले मिल्न सकेनौ न म रोकिए न तिमी नै। 

I care, I Love, I know and I do. I dream, I scream. I be, I see. I am, You are. I cry, I try. I believe, I relive. I fly, I fall. I gather, I rain. I possess, I loss. I advice, I m criticized. I hold, I leave. I kiss, I breath. I walk, I return. But I'm with & inside and my heart just slide. "Whenever I write about you , I have so much thoughts but very few words to tell what you mean to me."

You remember the night Right after the day's fight You put it on my nail As slowly as walk of snail Its still Blue. It gives me a clue, solely all about you. My nail is blue, stuck like glue. Its really blue. But it's fading away and I can't make it stay...

I'm entangled I'm determined I have you what I see through I have no senses since they are faded I have no heart because they are jaded It's enough now please have mercy on me Untie me Untie me If you love me let me know if dont gently let me go...

I am gonna miss your countenance always silence yet saying everything like they have all belongings.